Lots of fun to be had by all…..

The season has finally begun for me after somewhat of a slow start. I’ve already had quite a few changes to my schedule for various reasons. The weather has affected a lot of people and of course the other important climate; the economic one.

Brides are being choosier as to where they want to spend their money and more emphasis is being put on the ceremony and the emotive value of the actual marriage celebration. I think this is a good thing. Of course, I would. It’s very stressful for people who are putting together their own wedding. And I think the major issue is that it all seems so easy until you have to do it. The small things get you.

It’s one thing to book a caterer, but then you need to decide who goes where, what shape of table, what colour linens, what are we drinking, when are we drinking it etc, etc, etc. This is even true for a small home wedding. Just where is the best place for the food to go, and who is looking after it during the day?

Often the best wedding gift you can give is help. If you know the couple are planning a wedding themselves at home, just see if you can help in any way. Simple things that ease the pressure. It could be as easy as, I’ll make sure the plates on the buffet stay replenished, or I’ll stack bottles of water for those trying to stay hydrated in the hot sun. I’ve officiated at weddings where the bride is running around madly in her gown, and it’s almost a welcome breather when she gets to take time out for the ceremony.

If your budget allows for a wedding planner, I do recommend that you use one. If not, then why not ask a good friend or family member to be your planner and bounce ideas off each other. Remember to choose someone that you can argue with, preferably someone that is NOT contributing financially to the event. That way you avoid them feeling that they have the right to override your decisions. On the other hand, don’t treat them as a ‘wedding employee’. No bridezilla tactics allowed!

The best part of being an officiant…

Sometimes I wonder why I find it so wonderful to be a part of a wedding. I have often tried to evaluate my feelings on this subject. To a lot of business people a customer is just that, a customer. To a wedding officiant, however the customer becomes ‘one of my couples’.  I was looking back at the pictures of weddings I officiated at in 2007, and every one of them had a little story behind it and made me smile.

One wedding was remarkable for being the most difficult to find. It was in Roger Williams Park in Rhode Island, I live in NewHampshire, so it was a 100 mile trip to make the ceremony. Being English as I am, the holidays are not second nature to me yet, and it turned out to be a major holiday weekend. Not a bad thing until we get to the park. I think every single soul living in RI was there. It took us almost an hour to navigate the crowds at the park, and there were 7 weddings that I encountered. At each one I had to stop, ask if they were my couple, and move on. Needless to say, I was 10 minutes late, the bride was too busy to answer her phone, and eventually called me on my cell phone. Mother of the bride was cranky when I pulled up, did not want to hear how driving 100 miles was easy compared to finding the wedding in the park amongst thousands of people. All the weddings I had stopped at were in rose gardens, under columnar roofs, in archways and all the usual places. This wedding was under a tree with a ribbon on it. That explains why I couldn’t find it. My contracts now have a clause that asks for specific directions that MUST be accurate. A designated contact who keeps their cell phone on until I arrive, and MUST answer it! And allowances for location….they knew the park would be crowded, I did not. I could really have used that information.

The wedding was a beautiful one that included a third vow to their child, and the couple were charming. MOB was still cranky, because I made one of the wedding party go home and get the license before I would do the ceremony….the law is the law . No license = no wedding.  If you can remember all the flower petals and bubbles, you can remember to bring the piece of paper to make it legal. Can’t you? Needless to say, I was not popular with MOB, but I liked the couple and was proud to be part of their day.